Shame Unrooted
8-Week Erotic Embodiment
Hello beautiful,
Welcome to the pleasure portal!
I believe that transformation requires safety- this is why you are here.
You are here because you know on some deep level that there is safety in exploring your true self here. I am here to support you as move through exploring your desires, and the difficulties that moving through these experiences can bring.
Your willingness to invest your time into this, shows me that your desire to be aligned with your pleasure is strong. This is a huge indicator of commitment to growth.
What is seductress embodiment?
It is intrinsic feeling of fullness that comes with embodying sexual liberation. This can be done through internal or external sexual exploration. A significant part of this work will be done through inward reflection of the self, embodiment teachings, readings, and the practice of mindfulness, and self pleasure.
Mindful masturbation a practice that combines mindfulness with self-pleasure techniques. When we think of orgasms, we think of pleasure. We were born into a society that allows pleasure to some and not others, that represses the sexual desires and ability to explore orgasms, healthy sexual pleasure, body love and liberation, and so many more other aspects of you personhood that are your right as a human being to have.
I give you permission to feel pleasure.
I give you permission to act on your desires.
I give you permission to feel as deeply into your yoni as you possibly fucking can.
This course will teach you how to use self pleasure as a doorway to discover the source of your own power.
You are the sole proprietor of this journey. In a world that we are indoctrinated into, where choice feels scarce, the autonomy we have over our bodies is one of the most important components. I want you to get in touch with that again here.
You are going to be liberated in your sexuality, move through sexual shame, heal from it, and learn how to thrive.
Are you ready?
xoxo, Violet
Weekly Modules
Week 1: Letting Go: A Story of Dhumavati
It all begins with an idea. Maybe you want to launch a business. Maybe you want to turn a hobby into something more. Or maybe you have a creative project to share with the world.
"Disappointment is a multilayered teacher. Not many of us would choose to apprentice with her, yet sooner or later most of us do Then the Goddess Dhumavati flies into our awareness, accompanied by her crow, a harbinger of worldly misfortune who ironically bestows the inner gifts of detachment, emptiness, and freedom". - Sally Kempton
The Clergyman
At the age of 46, a clergyman was subjected to false complaints of wrongdoing. Within a few days, he lost his congregation, access to his children, his profession, and his reputation. He went to live in a different city, and one evening he was invited to dinner at the house of a local family. When he was introduced to the other guests, one fo them whispered to the host that she wouldn't sit at the same table with someone who might be a criminal. The host, with some embarrassment, asked the clergyman to leave. It was a moment of soul-grinding humiliation for this man, who was used to being the beloved center of such gatherings. That night, he sat on the side of his bed, weeping and praying for hours.
That night he sat on the side of his bed, weeping and praying for hours. Early in the morning, out of nowhere, waves of ecstatic energy began to run through his body. He felt completely alive with the recognition of the divine in the universe, living as a his human self. At that moment, he remembered a statement of St. Francis that a friend had quoted to him. Asked what he considered perfect joy. Francis said that to be kicked out of a house where he was begging for food, and left in the gutter with the dogs would be perfect joy. The clergyman had found that statement incomprehensible, but that morning, he understood for the first time the gift of being an outcast.
Journaling Magic
1. Note the feelings in your body when you think of people in your life that have abandoned you or disappointed you.
2. Note some of the aspects of your life that you feel are unfinished or unsatisfying. What does letting them go feel like in your body?
1. Begin this week by writing this phrase in your journal. "I am whole no matter what I have done, or what has been done to me".
2. Read the excerpt below from "All About Love", by Bell Hook
Week 2: The Path to Self Love
Week 3: A Sex Negative Society
"Why might the seemingly simple fact that all human genitals are made of the same parts, organized in different ways, be the most important thing you'll ever learn about human sexuality?
Two Reasons:
Because it means your genitals are normal- and not just normal, but amazing and beautiful and captivating and delicious and enticing, on down the alphabet, all the way to zesty- regardless of what they look like. They are made of all the same parts as everyone else's genitals, organized in a configuration utterly unique to you. The entire range is normal. Beautiful. Perfect. And because it is true for each and every facet of human sexual expression. As we'll see in the chapters that follow, from genital response to spanking fetishes, our sexual physiology, psychology, and desire are all made of the same parts, just organized in different ways". -Emily Nagoski, Come as You Are
What things did your own family, culture, or society plant in your mind about you? (refer to the bottom of p.38).
What seeds do you wish to plant in your garden moving forward?
Become familiar with your genitals. The list of reasons and excuses for folks to be out of touch with their own genitals is so vast and only continues to perpetuate the stigma and self-hatred of your own body. Even when she is talking about vulvas, she still draws attention to the anatomical similarities between a vulva and a penis, so if you are a penis owner, you can still explore this section, and explore your body with the genital configuration that you want in mind.
When was the last time you looked in the mirror at your genitals?
What does this bring up for you when you do this exercise?
If you haven't taken the time to explore your genitals visually, why is that? (by explore, I mean touch, smell, taste, feel, and learn about them, and what makes them feel goooooood)
Week 4: Learning to Receive: Seductress Mentality
1. All that has to do with embodying royalty, is about how we receive from others. The feminine essenced being loves to received. The energy exchange must be acknowledged when giving anything to others.
2. Write this phrase down: "I am worthy of receiving pleasure". Note what you feel in your body when doing this.
3. Deprogramming the unconditional giving, and the nurturing mentality. Begin by acknowledging that you are on this planet to receive pleasure, and that you will be taking that, and advocating for yourself right now.
4. Activity: Say "you are welcome" when someone says thank you to you.
5. Activity: When someone offers you help, say "yes".
Week 5: The Practice
For many of us, one is not enough, or has not been working. Self-pleasure when we are in our heads about it can be a chore. The truth is self-pleasure has the potential to be not only blissful, and euphoric, but also a source of power. This is a shift in mindset, a shift in reclaiming our own bodily autonomy.
Ground yourself through personal touch. Mindfulness is the practice of focusing on the here and now through conscious breathing. So what is going to happen is you are going to add personal touch to that practice. Many of you may be numb to physical touch, and the urge to give up along with anger and frustration will arise. Remember:.
Lead with curiosity
Acknowledge your anger
Try and be nonjudgmental and non-reactive towards your actions as you touch your body (this is so weird, ugh I can’t do this alone
Touch your body, grab lotion, put music on if you choose to drown out the noises in your head.
If you cannot focus on your breathing, focus on your touch.
Week 6: Shadow Work and Overcoming Programming
1. Part of taking control of your journey is taking responsibility. Stress, intrusive thoughts, and even reactions that our body's are having that we have no control over, we soon will.
2. When experiencing intrusive thoughts, remember that you are the source. You are the source of your pleasure, which means you are the source of your reluctancy to receive pleasure.
3. Practice taking control of your story by using "I" statements when you talk this week. By using "I" statements, you are taking responsibility for your actions, and your journey.
The journey of overcoming programming is different for all of us, and can sometimes be brought on by larger, and intense events. The feminine experience brings on a certain set of struggles of it's own. Many of us began our journey of self discovery because of masculine energies like the one you will read about in the story below. Read "The Story of Bluebeard" from the book "Women Who Run with Wolves". Write down your initial takeways from the story.
Week 7: Gratitude and Devotion
Write a letter to your body. Begin with the following and elaborate further:
"Dear Body, I want to thank you for all of the ways you've held me
Thank you body, thank you for what you’ve done.
Thank you for enduring what you have.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Thank you for your resilience.
Thank you for trying.
Thank you for showing me that I am capable of pleasure".
Write this down, and look at it whenever you feel unmotivated.
"I am devoted to you life".
If you cannot be devoted to anything; meditation, self pleasure, going to the gym, be devoted to your life. Be devoted to being present as much of your life as you can, even when “the pleasurable” seem not pleasurable.
Week 8: Growing your Intuition
Knowing what is right for you. This is not something I can tell you, or teach you, but rather show you that your inner knowing is the most powerful part of you.
Encouraged Readings
The Body Keeps the Score by Bessell van der Kolk : This book offers a beautiful insight to understanding the short and long term effects of trauma in ourselves, and how they can impact our physical state.
Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski: This book will illicit confidence simply because of the validation that it gives female people by exploring in depth their sexual nature on a scientific basis.
Polysecure by Jessica Fern: If you are not someone who practices polyamory, I highly encourage this book to understand attachment style, and potential effects that developing insecure attachment can have on your relationships with others.
Pussy: A Reclamation by Regina Thomshaeur: Understanding the feminine on a more energetic level, this book oozes with sexual empowerment and embodiment practices.